The Mall and Morning Pages
I went to the mall. I had to return the linen-blend pants from Old Navy, and thought I’d stop by Macy’s to see if they had any of my underwear. I’ve been wearing and loving the Warner’s “no muffin top” hipster underwear in cotton with a lace waistband. I already had 6 pairs in black, and today I got another black pair and two pairs of dark heather grey with black lace. This brings me up to 9 pairs altogether, which means I can finally get rid of my worn-out microfiber briefs that pull up to my chin when I’m being funny. All this mall-walking got me thinking about T-shirts and the long stretch of time before my smaller storage clothes fit. If I end up eliminating the 3X J. Crew T-shirts sometime soon (they really are too big), that will leave me with 7 tees. I’m also thinking of parting with my white ASOS T-shirt that was so hard-won- destroying the original, switching to a double-layer Gap Factory one, breaking down and rebuying the ASOS one. But you know, it’s never been the same as the first one, never been the same as the black and grey ones. It’s not as soft, it shrank up significantly in the wash, and it’s a bit stiff and short now. Every time I go to wear it, I end up taking it off and wearing something else. Leave it to me to order the identical T-shirt and have it be completely different. Maybe the single tees are different from the ones that come in the 3-pack? It’s a mystery. Regardless, now we’re down to 6 tees. As things have been getting too big and my wardrobe is whittling down, I’ve considered seeing just how far I can take this whole minimalism thing. 6 tees and 1 blouse, 2 jeans, 2 pants, and 1 skirt, 3 coats and 5 layers. Could I get by on this amount- 20 items? Would it even be a struggle? I think I’m going to hold out on buying anything else as far as my everyday wardrobe and see how it shakes out. I was deliberating my T-shirt options, noodling online, trying on various sizes at the mall (Why do LOFT and J. Crew not carry XXL in stores? Would that really be bad for business? I mean, LOFT goes so far as to carry plus sizes in store but no XXL. What’s going on there?). And I guess I’m still keeping thrifting in mind. But maybe I’m discovering another opportunity in all my clothes being too big. There’s the opportunity I recently found to stop looking in the mirror, but this could also be an opportunity for me to push my minimalist muscle.
There is another area of my wardrobe that may need some attention, and that’s my workout and pajama T-shirts. For summer, they’ve worked great- sleep in one, work out in it the next day. But come Fall (and our impending return to Germany) I’ll need to wear something warmer to work out in outside. I have a tight-fitting Under Armour base layer top, but that would need to go under my oversized T-shirts and therefore need to be washed quite frequently. I don’t think we’ll have access to a washer this time- the last time we stayed in this apartment we had to go to the laundromat, so there was a lot of hand washing in a bucket that I did not enjoy. I also own a water-resistant Under Armour hoodie that packs up pretty well, or I have my bulky fleece that I’ve been wearing for the last 40 pounds. Point being, I’m not sure if the T-shirt system will work in the colder months.
And do I just keep wearing the same workout/pajama T-shirts from 40 pounds ago? Do I wait the 4 months for the smaller storage options to fit? Or do I downsize now? I guess the minimalist in me says to stick it out- there’s nothing wrong with wearing oversized tees to work out or sleep in. The consumer in me wants new things! Pretty things in pretty colors! A reward for losing weight! Do I squelch those voices? Or should I channel them into thrifting?
I really go back and forth every day, focusing on the drama of my changing wardrobe instead of dealing with more difficult things. I know that deep down, I want to be more creative, I want to start writing music or poems or going through my older scraps of poems and trying to make something out of them. I got the book The Artist’s Way and have barely started reading it. I got stuck on this whole idea of morning pages: 3 pages, stream of consciousness, first thing every day to get your “artist brain” warmed up. But I just keep writing blogs about T-shirts in the afternoon instead. I’m afraid I’ll “use up” everything I’ve got if I do the morning pages. But maybe that thinking is part of the problem. Maybe there is not a limited well of creative output. Maybe I have more to say, more important things to say, than prattling on about my wardrobe. Maybe I’ve got more in me, and I need to clear the slate each day with the morning pages. It’s worth a shot.